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Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Nieceley's Believe It or Not


I made it. The dog made it. The cat made it. The fish made it. The turtles made it. The peking ducks flew away. Daffy and Lily fled from the Fashionaunta Zoo. On Saturday morning, I went down to feed the two ducks, but saw their buckets of food were spilled everywhere, and them, nowhere to be found. The first thing I did was triple check for them, and the second was calling Fashionaunta. Of course, this would happen under my care. Typical.

Saturday afternoon, around 3:30, a few girlfriends came to the island to get out of the city, swim, and house sit with me. They were taken aback by the view of the house, and told me maybe five times each that I was so fortunate to come back to this house every day. I agreed. We decided, while having a girls night in, that we needed a little bit of fun. So, pushing the couches and dining table out of the way, we turned on the stereo, and danced to music. And then, the doorbell rang. A male police officer suited up, telling us that he received a noise complaint from one of the neighbors. I looked at the girls completely flustered, them seeming to be fine. He asked to take a look inside of the house, so I allowed him in. I turned around only to find the officer's suit ripped off and him in a red thong, only carrying handcuffs, and moving his hips like Ricky Martin. The rest is history.


Sunday, I made sure I cleaned the house, dropped the crazy girls off at the train station assuring them I'd come into the city later in the day, and went back to the house and fell asleep watching "I Love You, Man". After a few loads of laundry, I was packed and ready to head to the city. I had called for a cab to take me to the train station and requested them to be at my house at 6:15. I stood outside of the house a few minutes early, hoping that they cab driver would be on time. That he was, but he started honking like a madman outside of the house that was one before mine. I jumped and waved, but this guy wouldn't stop. I ran into the driveway and finally he saw me. I got in the taxi. It smelled like cigarettes and Burger King... yum.

"A MERRY GOOD AFTERNOON!" he exclaimed, his head moving like a bobble head.
"Excuse me?" I said, automatically questioning if I would make it to the train station safely in my head.
"A MERRY GOOD AFTERNOON! LIKE MERRY CHRISTMAS! BUT, MERRY GOOD AFTERNOON! HAHAHAHA!"
All I could think was, "Holy shit. I'm dead." But instead of saying anything, I sat there as mute as possible, trying not to show that I saw how badly this man was shaking, and how utterly insane he portrayed himself to be. (When I had spoken to a man from the cab company, he told me the ride would be $7.) Surprisingly enough, we made it to the train station. I handed the nutjob a $20. Reassuring myself, I asked, "How much is it?"

"YOU DONT KNOW HOW MUCH IT IS?!" he yelled at me.
Okay, I was officially scared. "Seven dollars?" I replied nervously.
"NO, THE RATES WENT UP. IT'S $6.28 PLUS TAX!"
"Okay, so can I please have ten back?" I asked in a rush, simply wanting to get out of there immediately.
"DID YOU NOT HEAR WHAT I SAID? I SAID THE RATES WENT UP!" he yelled again.
"Okay, just keep it." I said frantically, opening the door to get out.
"I'M JUST MESSIN' WITH YA! HERE YOU GO!" he shouted, handing me a ten back. "SMILE!" he yelled.
I bolted out of the cab as fast as I could.

I made it to the Jamaica station, where I transfer onto the Oyster Bay train line. I sat across from a woman that had stringy, white-blonde hair and the most wrinkled face I believe I've ever seen. Through the reflection of the window, I saw a conductor ask for the woman's ticket. She fumbled through her purse, pulling out multiple papers that might possibly be what she needs the conductor to punch and move on. Because it took so long, the conductor said she would come back after she was done with the car. Instead of looking for her ticket, the woman spent her time trying to open a plastic bottle of Sprite. It seemed to be very challenging for her. The conductor came back and asked the woman if she had found her ticket. The woman shook her head and handed the conductor a five dollar bill. As the conductor was rummaging for change, the old woman put her head in her hands and started to cry. When she stopped crying, she would squint her eyes shut, and her face was so baggy that the skin around her eyes would stick together longer than her actual eyes were shut. She then proceeded to curse and occasionally cry all the way to Penn Station. I was convinced it was Nutjob Sunday.


Monday was spent lounging around, catching up on relaxation, and going to see the movie 'Extract'. The movie was hilarious, and I snacked on Flaming Hot Cheeto's and cream cheese. Don't ask.


Today at the office, the mood is back up and pumping! Abby is back from her Eurotrip, and bought me a very cute bracelet that I'll be wearing every day, and an adorable keychain from Holland. I've listened to 23 voicemails, entered names into Filemaker, helped with the seating chart for the Badgley Mischka show, ran some deliveries over to the Badgley Mischka showroom, and researched a school of interest! After work, Abby and I are attending a Seventeen Magazine special screening of MTV's "The City", with a "special guest" and the October 2009 cover girl, Whitney Port. Do you see why I love when Abby's in town?


The day has flown by, I hope you all have had a great one!

Until tomorrow!

XXO
Fashionieceta

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